I’ve put off writing this blog entry for a little while, because quite frankly it’s a little bit depressing.
I’ll try keep it light and jolly but here’s the tea…
The other half and I are no more. I’m just a single half although, technically I guess that just makes me one whole now? I’m not half of anything, I’m just me. I think that’s ok though.
It’s kind of thrown everything up in the air especially with regards to the house, but now since I am my own whole – I can make decisions that just suit me, which whilst being incredibly scary, it’s also quite exciting.
The ex other half has moved out and taken his dog back to London with him – so no more boxer trying to get in the shower with me. As much as I moaned, I’m pretty devastated about that – but it’s not all bad!
My go to, knee jerk reaction to all traumatic events has been to get a dog. When I was 19 and broke up with my first real boyfriend, I wanted a dog. When my Dad died, I wanted a dog. When I had a hangover once, I briefly considered getting a rabbit but I knew that was just a substitute for wanting a dog. Now here I am again, at a crossroads, at heartbreak and guess what I want…
But now I’m older, I’m independent, I’m out of excuses so I’m going to bloody well get a dog. I mean, it’s a better solution than Tinder isn’t it.
He’s called Gaetan and I’m only going to explain this once so listen carefully.
Gaetan is a french boy’s name, the Italian of which is Gaetano and means “From Gaeta”. I chose the name because I liked it and then decided to look up what it means. Gaeta is an Italian town not far from Naples – where Dad is from. This may be a tenuous link but any link to my Dad is good enough for me. I’m going to call him Guy (and spell it Gae) for short. Are you keeping up? Anyway here he is…
LOOK AT HIS FACE, WHAT AN ABSOLUTE BABE, LOOK AT HIS FACE AGAIN.OMG HIS EARS.
I love him already.
So now to the house.
It’s about half way through construction but what do I do? I want the perfect home for me and Gae. BECAUSE LOOK AT HIS FACE HE DESERVES THE WHOLE WORLD. Sorry.
So here’s my choices, I carry on and live a life I’d planned with someone else on my own.
Or I move on and do my own thing. Maybe I”ll do that. I could start all over again, finish what I started then start again. Maybe in the next few months you’ll be on a new house journey with me? I’ve realised I was holding on to the house to hold on to my Dad, but at the end of the day I can do that wherever I am. Just because he’s not physically here, it doesn’t mean I don’t have my Dad anymore. I have everything he’s ever taught me and every piece of advice and every bit of love he’s ever given me. So I’ve got all I need, just me, my own whole – and of course my doggo.
My Dad would have loved him.