I would like to apologise to whoever it is up there that has given me my life’s path over the last few months.
You see I believe a lot in fate, and I believe that everything that happens is for a reason and challenges and gifts are given to you in equal measure (although not always evenly spread out). So I have the house and we were doing it up – I realise now that it was definitely a gift. I’m sorry that I wasn’t more grateful, I’m sorry that I complained that the bathroom wasn’t finished and that I didn’t like the wall paper and that I didn’t work harder to get further along with renovating it before now.
It now seems as though all the grumblings were heard and our great Lord and Saviour decided that I was not accepting of my gift. He changed my life plan again and put it in my heart that I was going to get a little tiny puppy. And I did.
I haven’t slept in a week.
I long for the days when my biggest problem was the fact that I hated the bedroom wall paper and the bathroom floor wasn’t grouted – because that is still the case, except now I haven’t got time to think about it since I’m forever trying to stop this monster/ gremlin hybrid from eating everything in sight, including me.
I feel very conscious that I need to patch my ceiling up and repaint the kitchen, I feel conscious that I need to perhaps get it on the market and time is ticking – how are we in March already? However, I am so unbelievably exhausted that all I want to do is nap.
Nobody told me, not one of you buggers warned me, that it is just like having an actual child, but worse because at least you can put a nappy on a baby. Late nights and early mornings making sure the puppy has been fed and watered and has a wee. I know I’m probably being a bit mad and pandering to him a little bit but how can you just ignore them? My little baby and his tiny bladder can’t wait that long. So I guess I’ll just not sleep.
Anytime he’s asleep in the day, I generally try to get some work done but usually by the time I’ve got my laptop out, GUESS WHAT HES AWAKE AGAIN! (just for information, this has just this moment happened and I’ve now to make sure he has a wee in the correct location and doesn’t chew the curtain on the way past).
*Update – he managed it just next to the puppy pad. Not on it, next to it.*
Anyway – once again my grumblings were heard and I’d like to apologise again. Sorry, he’s fine, really, he’s absolutely beautiful and I don’t need to sleep. I’d therefore now rather he wasn’t constipated anymore. I’ve been challenged enough.
Aww, the poor little mite is trying so hard and I feel so sorry for him that I didn’t even mind when a whole puppy poo flew out his bum with such force it nearly took my nose off and splatted on the kitchen cupboard. Honestly, I’ve never seen anything like it. It had sound effects, I’ll let you imagine what they were.
Then as I was on all fours trying to clean up the mess, he climbed onto the back of my legs and fell asleep.
Don’t worry he’s been to the vet about him taking off like Apollo 13 and am assured he’s ok – this too shall pass. Literally.
As if to further berate me, I left him with my mum for the morning yesterday and upon my return I found that he now prefers her lap, and her cuddles and her playtime. The ultimate betrayal. I’m going to win him back.
So dear God/Dad/master of the universe, I’m sorry that I ever complained about anything and please know that I love my little gremlin man so much that my heart might burst I promise…
but please, please, let me sleep.